Happy New(ish) Year (and other random assorted things)
Well, it's 2005...and you all know what that means- the world hasn't ended, YET. Anything's possible, so I'm not ruling it out. Seriously though, it means that the date that I thought would never come, that seemed so unreachable, so far away, is only 4 months away. What am I talking about? Graduation, of course. I remember in third grade seeing on our group portrait an inscription that read "Meet The Future Class of 2005", and I thought to myself- "Jesus, I have to wait THAT LONG?", only to find it wasn't that long at all. However, unlike the majority of happy idiots graduating with me, I think I'm leaving with a different view. Instead of looking back with nostalgic and sentimental rememberance, I will glace at my past and think "Thank God it's over.". Because High School sucks. Living at home...sucks. Having to rely on someone when you're perfectly capable of doing things yourself....SUCKS! I have spent all this idle time letting my once vibrant mind and IQ be slowly killed by the school system.
Don't get me wrong...I believe strongly in education, I believe in knowing things of the world, opening yourself to new experiences of every creed. I guess I'm just wondering why I felt so much smarter Freshman year, and now I feel as if I know nothing, and the only thing I want to do is get away from everything (with a few exceptions).
My life would be much easier now if I had gotten a 100% guaranteed acceptance to college, but instead, all I hear from EVERYONE is "What are you going to do about YOUR FUTURE???". Meanwhile, I sit there dumbfounded because all I'VE EVER TALKED ABOUT IS MY GOD-DAMNED FUTURE. I give a look that basically states "What the fuck are you talking about? That's all I've been planning for since I was 11- my break from here. These questions lead me to believe that you haven't been listening to a fucking word I've been saying for the past however many years." I know what I have to do...you DON'T have to make it worse by piling on more stress on the already towering and swaying pile of worries and apprehensions I have put upon myself.
I guess I'm just a little pissed off right now...if you couldn't tell already. I'm not saying everything I've just written is completely fair, or rational...and frankly, I don't give a shit if any of it is. I don't even care if it's immature, because even I have license to be that way every now and again, despite popular belief. Point is, I'm a little on-edge today, and I feel better as a result of typing all this out. Now, if only I had the guts to say this outloud.
When's Graduation again?
Don't get me wrong...I believe strongly in education, I believe in knowing things of the world, opening yourself to new experiences of every creed. I guess I'm just wondering why I felt so much smarter Freshman year, and now I feel as if I know nothing, and the only thing I want to do is get away from everything (with a few exceptions).
My life would be much easier now if I had gotten a 100% guaranteed acceptance to college, but instead, all I hear from EVERYONE is "What are you going to do about YOUR FUTURE???". Meanwhile, I sit there dumbfounded because all I'VE EVER TALKED ABOUT IS MY GOD-DAMNED FUTURE. I give a look that basically states "What the fuck are you talking about? That's all I've been planning for since I was 11- my break from here. These questions lead me to believe that you haven't been listening to a fucking word I've been saying for the past however many years." I know what I have to do...you DON'T have to make it worse by piling on more stress on the already towering and swaying pile of worries and apprehensions I have put upon myself.
I guess I'm just a little pissed off right now...if you couldn't tell already. I'm not saying everything I've just written is completely fair, or rational...and frankly, I don't give a shit if any of it is. I don't even care if it's immature, because even I have license to be that way every now and again, despite popular belief. Point is, I'm a little on-edge today, and I feel better as a result of typing all this out. Now, if only I had the guts to say this outloud.
When's Graduation again?
posted by Jenna at 1:18 PM
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