I'm bored.

I'm using tiny font to torture those of you who need reading glasses...how- inconsiderate of me. I suck. Some people know a lot about that. Anywho...it's fairly obvious. I am bored out of my mind. I'm not tired, and if I had my way, I'd be in my car driving freely around town until dawn, but no, like the rest of the world, I have to work tomorrow. That's ok, with all the deliveries, I can drive around from dawn till dusk, which is almost the same, except more traffic and more assholes to deal with. I really can't find a point to this whole post, but is that going to stop me? NO! No amount of grammatical errors, misspellings, or lack of direction can stop me! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH *cough* ahhh...

I saw Phantom of the Opera last night. Before I go any further, you all must realize that I've been listening to the music since before I could talk. It came out when I was but a young youngin', and it was my Raffie equivalent. You know Raffie, the bald guy with the guitar...he sang about whales and dragons and llamas...and...erm...nevermind. Anyway, Phantom is a musical I know better than the back of my hand, and I know my hands pretty well. I stare at them enough (too much information). ANYWAY- I could do the production by myself if I were a soprano. I've memorized every vocal inflection, every single musical cue, timing, harmonies, orchestral idiosyncrasies- EVERYTHING having to do with the music. I was fairly indifferent to the costuming, filler dialogue, choreography- things of that sort, even though they did do a very impressive job with those things. My focus was the music- and here's what pissed me off. Firstly, almost all the characters (except the Vicount de Chagney) added their own twist to how the words were sung (which was to be expected) and destroyed the effect of certain parts. Christine tended to drag out her lines, and the Phantom sang lines that were better spoken, and spoke lines that required singing. That was a pattern throughout the movie- they really shouldn't have turned parts intended for singing into spoken-word. It was like they were reciting cheesy poetry on amateur night. That frustrated me. The voices for all the characters were acceptable to dead on, except for, again, Christine and the Phantom. Christine nailed certain parts, but I think, overall, her voice was far too weak and immature for the role. The Phantom's voice was far too clouded, too raspy- course, I am a purist, and in my mind, the only person who could ever play the Phantom was Michael Crawford. Crawford's voice is clear, bright, powerful, emotional...Just an absolutely beautiful voice. He was made for that role, and I just don't do well when I hear other versions. Well, actually, when I saw the stage production a few years ago, the guy playing Phantom there was amazing- but I just can't remember his name. That sounds like a research project.
Ok, I've hit the bad. Sort of. I'm easily distracted. No matter- I shall touch on the good. Everything else was good, aside from some cheesy camera effects that made the story too much like a made for television version of Cinderella or something (glitter everywhere!). What they really hit DEAD ON was the scene where the Phantom gives Christine the ultimatum, him or death to her fiance, Raul (the Vicount). They did that one so well it brought tears to my eyes. The one thing that I just couldn't argue with...it was...Beautiful *sniff*. The emotion was just there, and it was a beautiful piece of cinema. They also shot the "Point of No Return" perfectly. I was deeply impressed (and a little turned on).
In short, as much of an insufferable shmuck Andrew Lloyd Webber is, he didn't do what I feared he'd do, destroy the last good musical he ever wrote. And Joel Shumacker, well, he is a shmuck too, and he didn't destroy much. So, I suppose I'll allow him to live. Anyway...I'm done.